Saturday, October 15, 2011
What a wet and beautiful week! Haha... I'm still laughing at how perfectly Andrew stated my disease- that I chronically puke out all my thoughts at one time when writing my letters.... hahaha... and I'll try to be more organized, and at least, more brief. :)
Conference was exactly that "spiritual spa weekend" that I had been promising everyone else it would be. It was just what we all needed, huh? The past two weeks I had been greatly tempted with frustration. Despite the leader's declarations and assurances of visible changes... I in my impatient nature... was getting a little down and frustrated with the little progress we seemed to have been seeing in so many of the people that we have been working with for months. I related all too well with Nephi while reading in 2 Nephi with his mourning for his people because they didn't want anything to do with spiritual things, they didn't seek learning or understanding... and even Nephi... couldn't make them wake up. This has allowed me a lot of self reflection and analyzing of my service, purpose, expectations, desires, and dreams as a missionary. I found so much comfort and direction in Conference. I thought... if I can feel THIS good sitting in a nearly empty Belizean chapel watching a TV but feeling so close to the Savior... imagine how it must have been and WILL be to sit at the Savior's feet? mmmm... :)
The beautiful talk from Elder Yamashita brought a huge and beautiful wake up call to me. It was one of the moments when one knows he is talking to the whole world... but you feel like you're in a personal interview with only him talking to.... you. Hearing him talking about his missionaries... and the clear assurance that though they don't understand and get all the doctrine all at once... what truly makes the impact... is the love that they can feel from a missionary. The next few talks were all a blur after that... as my thick head, through my stiff neck, down to my hard heart... were melted, morphed, and caught up into a replay hundreds of memories and moments from my mission... and the undoubtable and overwhelming love I have felt. The famous phrase from Elder Maxwell fit perfectly... "moments are the molecules that make-up eternity". As hard as Belize has been... I couldn't dream of more precious material to construct my eternity. I realized this weekend... how much I deeply I really do love and adore these people that we're working with. It is a love that I had really never experienced to this radical degree before my mission. My frustration has been taken and through the Atonement, replaced with that vital love.
Oops... I promised a shorter letter... so I'll leave it there.
I put in pictures of how wet it is... I haven't had dry shoes all week... but the rain feels so good to sleep, run, and ride in. Another is a picture is of the famous "Sister Clark Surgery" for the all too common ingrown toenails.
P.S. oh! We're trying so hard to get visiting going here.... could you all send me whatever stories and experiences you've had with visiting teaching? It would help SO MUCH. They need it desperately. ASAP. Thank you!!